Sweet Mary

Week 6 Update and a Web Round-up

What can I say? I was due to bake something this weekend; however time has escaped me. And, frankly, so has the motivation! Don't worry, I will crank something crazy out later this week just for you. I've been craving something decadent. Something I wouldn't normally make. Something I can share with my housemates so I won't eat it all.

Right now, at the test kitchen, both the pie and pastry chapters have begun. Consequently, I have been making lots of doughs. Puff pastry. Pate a choux. Croissant dough. Three variations of pie dough. Yes, I know. It IS nice to know I am actually using knowledge and skills I gained from culinary school. Moreover, I've finally put the time and effort into my intern project for Johnson & Wales. It's not a challenging project, mind you. But, somehow, after all the homework and studying last year, I just didn't feel like journaling about my experience or writing reports on my progress. However, I am happy to report it's just about finished and I've finally made forward strides on my recipe project at the test kitchen.

In the midst of all of this, life has gotten in the way a bit. Oh...you know, things like emergency root canals, crazy allergies, back problems, a job interview, etc. It's been nutty. Something tells me I am ready to shed the student skin and move on back into some semblance of a normal life. Oh yes, how nice it would be to be paid for my work, to have assistance paying for health insurance, and my own place/space/kitchen.

You know, it was about two years ago that I was wondering how to find the courage to quit my job in international studies and go to culinary or art school. I'd say right now is almost as challenging as that period. In five weeks, I graduate. Therefore, the "what's next?" question is weighing heavily on me. All I know right now is that I am going to hang in there and work it all out....whatever that may mean. And, I am looking forward to whatever is next so I can move forward with my own baking/food projects without so many other time commitments.

I did also want to mention that I continue to check in on food blogs around the world on a weekly basis. There is a ton of interesting stuff going on out there, as usual. In fact, I think you should take a look at a few things that peaked my interest this week:

*Check out the article on Peter Menzel on Culinate. He is a photographer with a mission. His current book Hungry Planet examines the meaning behind what people around the world eat.

*Sometimes people ask me about baking low-fat desserts. I really haven't attempted to make many low-fat desserts. However, occasionally, I'll see a low-fat recipe or article. If you look at Cooking Light's article on low-fat cheesecakes, you might find something you can use or ideas with which to experiment.

*Ah....it's fall. Apple and pumpkin recipes abound. Don't miss this recipe on Simply Recipes for Pumpkin Ginger Nut Muffins. I am picky about my muffin recipes; however, this one looks like a winner. They are gorgeous.

*On another dietary note, I've gotten a few questions lately about gluten free recipes. You know, I was a vegan for about 6 years when I was in my 20s. In addition, I had some health issues that had me steering clear of gluten for a good long while. I tried to bake vegan and gluten free. I did. But, there really weren't any or many good recipes out there. And, this was before the Internet boomed, of course. I have to be honest, I am a bit scarred from my gluten free baking days. Some of the stuff I made simply tasted like crap. However, I just ran across a gluten free chocolate cupcake recipe on Cupcake Bakeshop by Chockylit. The author of this page creates the most innovative flavors for her cupcakes. She is a religious tester. She has a good grasp of ingredients and their functions. And, her photos are beautiful. Check it out. If you need a gluten-free cake recipe, this one just might do the trick.

On that note, I am going to go make some soup and watch football. Look for a recipe later this week.

Week 4 Update

I've been feeling guilty for not blogging more about my internship. I am already into week 4 here, which technically means there are only 8 weeks left. It's very different than culinary school. Very different. I make such a wide variety of items from week to week. And, it's a long day without any real break; consequently, when I get home, I don't feel like reflecting or rehashing details much. In addition, I can't bring a camera and start snapping photos of everything I do (as much as I'd like to!). It's a work environment where people are busy. An intern taking photos would be distracting. And, I should really stay focused and get my work done.

I do like it, though. Very much. I am finding it much much easier to organize my tasks and day which means the day runs pretty smoothly. And, once in a while, I do have some down time during which I conduct research for my internship project which is to develop a recipe for the pie chapter of the dessert book. That has been interesting, fun, and will really help me understand the job of a test cook. I've also been enjoying some of the discussions that arise from watching and/or participating in some of the tests or tastings. You really do learn a ton from just being around so much cooking and baking. When you've done a recipe or seen someone else do it 12 different times, you're bound to learn something.

Furthermore, I will reiterate that I really like my team. They are communicative, helpful, and very creative in the kitchen. So, all in all, the internship is truly going well and I have no complaints. Well, maybe one. It does suck and cause stress outside of work to not get paid. But, I knew that going into this and I'm doing my best to deal with the fact that I am a 38 year old intern!

Just so you have a clue as to what I've been up to in the test kitchen, here is a generic production list: cookie doughs (bar cookies, basic sugar dough, meringues, etc.), a little bread here and there (baguettes, pizza dough), cakes galore (vanilla cakes, genoise, chocolate cakes, frostings....and yes, I even had to slice one of those suckers into layers and ice it up today....which went very well after all the training in Chef Z's class!), tarts (fruit, chocolate, savory, blind baked, partially baked, tarte tatin, etc.), and pizzas. I even had to make two recipes of mac and cheese one day for an editor.

As for living in Boston, it has been going pretty well. I've been out and about in Jamaica Plain, Brookline, and the North End. I've eaten some good Thai food, visited Clear Flour Bread a few times, and am gearing up for an Afghani restaurant in Cambridge this Friday. I've seen some art at the Institute for Contemporary Art and even been out to Walden Pond. Oh...and I've been trying (not too hard) to become a Patriots fan. I think that might happen if I stick around longer than just a few months because I still feel a bit of longing for the Baltimore Ravens. What are you gonna do?

I hope to get my arse out to an apple orchard this weekend and do some pickin' in order to put something all nice and fall-like up in the recipe section (despite the fact that it was almost 90 degrees today!). Check back Sunday or Monday night.

Testing

On the first day of my internship, I had flashbacks of starting culinary school while walking to the test kitchen. White uniforms. Hoards of 19 years olds smoking cigarettes and talking about last nights party outside all of the buildings on campus. Notebooks. Lectures. Honestly, I had no idea what to expect. The first week of class kicked my butt, but by the fourth day or so I started habituating, my nerves calmed, and I just got to work.

That is exactly how I feel tonight after my first four days in the test kitchen. I'm tired and aching. But, it's not in a bad way. It's more of an understanding that this is what I signed up for and after three months of thinking about it, now it's happening. And, I'm glad, really glad, the first few days are out of the way so I can go in Monday all rested with the knowledge and experience I've already gained. Moreover, this was definitely the right choice for me. I will be challenged and learn a ton.

So, let me try to describe what it felt like for me. We (i.e. two other interns and me) had a 30 minute tour around the building that included some basic information and introductions. Then, we were introduced to our teams and handed recipes or tasks to do. It was kind of crazy and there was no time to really think. So, I just got to it. I baked a bunch of cakes and made frosting, as well as mise en placed (i.e got all the ingredients ready) a whole mess of stuff for the chefs. It was non-stop all day on my feet without a break. I wasn't sure how to prioritize as my pile of stuff to do grew, which made me a little frazzled!

It wasn't easy for me. I like to kind of wrap my brain around instructions, methods, theories, and information before I do anything. So, just being thrown into the turning wheel like that was pretty freaking stressful! However, after four days, some mistakes (of course), and a bunch of conversations with the chefs on my team, things are calmer and procedures are making sense. Time goes by so quickly that I have to be mindful to drink enough water, eat, and, if at all possible, take a short break.

So, I work on the book team and, right now, they are working on a dessert book. I think there are six chefs total and all of them at any time can give me things to do. Again, sometimes I am just preparing ingredients or doughs for them to use. For instance, for the past three days, there has been a photo shoot going on and I've made a bunch of cookie doughs for them to use during the demonstrations and photo stills. Many times, I am making recipes straight through to help them test different aspects (i.e. changed ingredients, height of a cake, measuring yields, fixing problems, etc).

The hardest thing for me so far has been to bake straight through a recipe following the instructions exactly even when you know something might be wrong or off. They want to see how someone in his or her own kitchen would fare with the recipe the way it is written. You can't take any shortcuts. You can't use any tricks you may have up your sleeve. And, you absolutely must measure accurately. So, really, they want you to take your time, read the recipe thoroughly, mise en place, and begin. Sometimes, though, they are looking for certain variables so they want to know how long it took to bake or mix so input is necessary.

In addition, in many instances, I have to unlearn some of the things I learned in culinary school. Their magazines and books are for the home cook or baker and not intended for an industrial kitchen. Measurements and methods can sometimes vary. It's quite different than being in school.

The environment there is a whirlwind of activity at various times of the day. Ovens are on and burners are going. There are people buzzing around and tastings going on all day long. And, yes, we do get to eat if we have a moment to spare. Once the official tastings are finished, the food is put into a communal space where anyone can grab a bite. Also, anything not eaten is packaged and is up for grabs at the end of the day. I've gotten to bring a few tasty things home this week for dinner. And, I have some pizza dough to use this weekend. Nice.

The tastings are also really interesting. I've been asked to be a part of a few and I feel really fortunate. I made two rosemary polenta cakes the other day using different methods and to be able to taste both, as well as here what the team had to say was a great learning moment. That's what a test kitchen is all about. I loved hearing about how and why the recipe developed and ingredients changed. So, already, in just a few days, I've learned quite a bit.

As for the people who work there, I'd say they are a really interesting mix. Funky. Quirky. Friendly. Funny. Creative. Dedicated. Hard working. Talented. And, there's a few, in particular, who seem to really take the time to work with and teach the interns. I appreciate that tremendously.

So, all in all, not a bad first week. Now, I'm going to go watch a movie and crawl into bed.

News: Part 2

Another huge part of the past several months has been researching and applying for internships/cooperative work experiences that will enable me to finish my degree during the fall trimester.  And, you know me, I can't do anything half heartedly or just take the first thing that comes along.  So, this has been a process.

I've explored all kinds of positions.  Big hotels.  Resorts.  Small family run bakeries.  Dessert and regular restaurants.  And, a few positions in test kitchens for on line or print publications.  All in all, I learned a great deal about industry jobs available for someone coming out of a program such as the AS in Baking and Pastry Art at Johnson & Wales. 

By no means have I meant to idealize the culinary world on this site.  It is tough work.  Long hours of very physical work for pretty crappy pay.  And, I would hope that it goes without saying that not everyone is going to become a "super chef" and have a TV show or book deal.  In fact, chances are pretty darn slim.  I don't mean this in a discouraging way.  It's simply a reality check.  And, you know, there are many levels of culinary success.  If you care about your work and products, you will do a good job whether it's at a health care facility, a chain restaurant, your own business, or a five-star hotel.  I think it's important to find where you fit in so you can do and be your best.  This is certainly what I've been trying to do all year.  It helps to love what you do.  I'm lucky because I really do love to bake.  I went to culinary school to simply pursue something I loved and see where it would take me (and to take a big break from my former career in higher education!).

Anyway, if anyone out there is thinking of culinary school, a career change, or working in the food industry, there is some great information on the blog, Eggbeater.   Scroll down the column on the right and you'll find all the links.  Shuna Lydon, the author, offers her thoughts on culinary school, working in the industry, and the importance of understanding the responsibility of becoming a chef.  I agree with a lot of what she has to say.  I certainly know that I am not a chef.  I am a home baker who has gone through a series of formal baking classes.  That makes me a novice at best.  A beginner.  There is no way I would put myself on level playing field with men and women who have years and years of experience, skills, and knowledge. 

This is a very long way of telling you that I have chosen my internship/cooperative work experience for fall semester.  It was such a tough decision.  Mostly because I want to try everything!  But, ultimately, I am a home baker who loves the feel of the home kitchen.  I am attracted to small bakeries and businesses.  However, I also grew to love the science of baking this year.  Testing and researching recipes.  Thinking about what could change or improve a recipe.  So, I began looking into a few positions that might allow me to experience such a kitchen or environment. 

Consequently, a while back, I began to contact America's Test Kitchen.  That's right, they do the show on PBS and publish Cook's Illustrated and Cook's Country.  And, I am really happy to announce that I will be interning there this fall.  My responsibilities will include a lot of prep work for the test cooks who bake, conducting a research project that hopefully will be used in later tests, and learning about how the experiments work.  I've been a fan of Cook's Illustrated for quite a while.  It is a culinary magazine made for home cooks.  In addition to the recipes, you will find product and ingredient reviews, comments from readers, and incredibly helpful tips.  And, did I mention there's no advertising?  That's right.  No ads.  It is wonderful. 

So, there you have it.  Classes are over.  And, I'm ready to move on to the last phase of my degree and explore what it's like to work in a test kitchen.  Until September, I will be relaxing...once I find a job!  I had a summer job all lined up, but it just fell through unexpectedly so I am currently busy hitting the pavement.  Never a dull moment with me, is there?

News: Part 1

The past week or so has really been a blur.  So, let me give you a quick update.

Classes are officially over.  I have to admit I became a bit sad as I walked out of my last class.  As I've said before, it was really a wonderful and crazy 9 months.  I loved every minute of it and even grew to like the wacky routine.  I really couldn't help but reflect on the tough life events that inspired me to make this happen in the first place.....what a difference time, healing, energy, and effort can make.   

After classes ended on Thursday, I had one more "obligation" on Friday morning....the Student Awards Ceremony.  I had received an email a few weeks ago that told me I had received some kind of "prestigious culinary award" and asked me to RSVP for the event.  I really wasn't sure what that meant and, considering this is my third degree, was kind of reluctant to sit through a long ceremony.  I'm just not one for all the pomp and circumstance.

Anyway, I was fortunate to have a few guests to witness the event, as my sister had already planned a visit and my aunt and uncle decided last minute to drive here from the Albany, NY area.  We sat through the two hour ceremony watching students receive their awards.  I started getting a bit cranky because it really seemed like I was only there for the quick stand-up in your seat recognition for the honors society!  No offense to JWU, but certainly not worth sitting through the ceremony and having family members with me!

As the presenters began announcing the last two awards, I was surprised (and damn proud!) to receive the freshman Faculty Scholarship Award.  This meant that my chefs nominated/recognized me for my efforts in the kitchen, which is truly an honor in my eyes.  And, it also meant that I will receive a considerable chunk of change for my last semester at JWU.  How nice is that?  They also gave me a really nice introduction, which I appreciated tremendously.   My sister got all choked up and my aunt jumped out of her seat clapping.  It was pretty hilarious and a fantastic way to end the academic year.

Instead of a baked treat, I'll break my blog rules and post a photo of my sister and me, all smiles. 

 

Don't Stop Believin'

That's a mini-me made out of fondant!

What does the title of a Journey song have to do with baking and pastry art, you ask?  Well, everything and nothing.

Today reminded me of why it's so great to get older.  And, to be around young people.  And, to be in some kind of educational environment.   And, to not give a flying monkey's arse about anything or anyone sometimes and just get a little silly.

With only a few days left of class, I realize how far I've come, how much I've learned.  And, I think I've just really appreciated taking this year to kind of just be in the moment and immerse myself in my classes.  I don't think I would have gotten as much out of it had I been the 18 year old I was about twenty years ago.  The timing was right.   I also feel I made some progress with a few skills in cake class, which is very very important to me.

I also just want to send out a big fat thank you to Group #1 of BPA 2100 for making my last class very memorable.  You girls rock.  You work hard.  You work accurately.  You get when to take a cake out of the oven.  You're fast.  You're organized.  You do dishes.  You clean.  You're always helpful, especially when I'm having a rough go of it. Your work ethic and artistry are inspiring.  And, you put up with the crazy "old" lady in your group, even when she's singing old Journey songs in falsetto. It gives me comfort to know that when I am truly old and gray, there are a few of you roaming around out there doing good things. Steve Perry and I only have one thing to say to you:  Don't Stop Believin'!

Below is a group photo (Liz, Kim, Diane, & Mary...Carrie was missing that day).  The last picture is of Mary and Liz, hanging with the band.

King Kong

Yesterday, my chef was surprised at how my cake turned out because he said that I "started out like King Kong."  I was having trouble working with ganache (chocolate and cream) as an icing because it sets up really fast.  It was definitely a moment of feeling like I have motor coordination and depth perception issues! With a little of his help, I pulled it off, glazed it, and went on to work on my marzipan carnation (which needs some work!).  It is called a Lutecia Torte and has layers of walnut chiffon, ganache, and whipped cream inside.

We also worked on a dome cake this week and kind of made it look like a watermelon with an airbrush.  I thought it would be super hard, but I swear I had more luck cutting and icing the dome than other cakes.  My vine and leaves are a tad large for the size of my flower, which I repaired after I took the photo. 

And, today we made a Crispy Coffee Torte, which was made of vanilla sponge cake, coffee flavored whipped cream, toasted almonds, and marzipan on the top.  I think I finally might be making some progress with the flowers.  Thank god, because there's only two weeks left and they are most definitely on the practical.

 

Cake Trials

Yes, yes.  I know.  It's my third week of cake class already and I have not shared one single photo or story with you.  It's not intentional.  I swear.  It's just that class goes by very quickly because it's been taking me forever to ice my cakes. I end up with photos, but not of my cakes! 

There are two skills I learned this year that just frustrate the hell out of me.  The first, as I mentioned in a previous post, was hand dipping pralines (i.e. chocolates).  No matter how many times the chef showed me or held my hand, it just didn't happen in the few days we dipped.  I knew it was a feeling I would have to catch on to.  Then, once I got the feel, it would become easier.  That never happened.  I suppose I would just need to dip dozens and dozens (and dozens) of chocolates for that light bulb moment to happen. 

The second skill is icing a cake.  For some, it's a breeze.  For me, it's a trial.  Perhaps it is my perfectionism that prevents me from just relaxing and letting it happen.  Perhaps I have a depth perception problem.  Perhaps I just cannot hold the damn bench scraper straight and end up screwing up the sides each and every time.    In my mind, I can see the cake all pretty and perfect.  But, in the end, it's kind of rough looking and usually a little crooked!   I keep trying, though.   And, I will keep trying. 

My current chef says it took him a year of doing cakes to "get it."  Then, when he did, it became easy.  A year.  That should make me feel better.  But, somehow my impatience gets the best of me. My frustration usually sets in when time is running out (oh, did I mention we're getting timed and graded on these just for a little added pressure?) and I still have the whole top to do.  The top is the decorative part.  It can include glazing, piping buttercream or chocolate or making marzipan roses.  So, with the clock ticking, that stuff ends up looking less than perfect, too.   Very hard to swallow for someone who likes to excel!

We did our eighth cake today.   And, yes, I did do a little better with the icing.  That is all I can ask for now.  Baby steps, I suppose.   Regardless, here are two of my cakes I did manage to snap a photo of before class ended.  The first is a glazed Praline Torte and the second is a Mocha Torte (with heaps of buttercream).  I'll do my best to get some more shots next week.

      

Pastillage

Chocolate and Sugar Showpieces is officially over and I've moved on to Advanced Cakes.  I spent the last two days of Chocolate/Sugar making a small pastillage showpiece.  Pastillage is a mix of powdered sugar, cornstarch and gelatin.  You mix it up and it is dough-like in consistency.  You can roll it out and make whatever you want out of it.  Although very delicate when it dries, it will last a long time. 

As usual, I can see all the flaws.  My water wheel is all crooked....I think this was my third attempt because every time I glued things together, it would break in my hand!  Very frustrating.  I felt myself longing for ovens and baked goods.  Some people really get into this and make huge intricate sculptures.  Click HERE to view an example.  I don't think I will be doing anything like that soon!

The Fish

Here is a photo of my final sugar showpiece.  Essentially, it is made of melted isomalt and sugar.  The isomalt or sugar is poured into molds or piped out of bags to make all the shapes and creatures.  We actually made the mold for the fish out of clay ourselves.  There was no way to document this process because you tend to have a few things bubbling and boiling at the same time.  You are also dealing with extremely hot tempertures that could cause serious burns.  So, you really need to stay focused and pay attention. 

We made some of the creatures ahead of time.  Then, yesterday, begin pouring/building the bases.  Today, we poured the wave and the fish.  Before assembling everything, we did some airbrushing onto the fish and creatures.  Although really time consuming the first time you go through the entire process, I really enjoyed it.  I hit my frustration point during the assembly process mostly because it was far more difficult to put everything together and glue it down with burning hot isomalt than it looked during our demonstration.  It is so easy to break things because the formed sugar/isomalt is literally like glass.  The tendency is to want to press on things to glue them on/down, but you really can't. 

I am super glad to be done with this sculpture.  I am not sure I will ever get to do another one again, but at least I know how.  I was satisfied with my results with the exception of those big huge bubbles on the top of the wave.  I had a ten minute cranky melt down when the hot sugar was hardening in the piping bag and getting sticky and stringy.  At that point, I was tired, hungry, and really needed to go to the restroom, but there was no stopping! 

Anyway, I have an enormous amount of respect for the chefs who do sugar sculptures in competitions.  They practice and practice until the process becomes automatic and they know exactly what to do.  Still, so many factors can affect sugar work (humidity, for example) and cause problems.  I was also pretty happy I didn't trip and break it when I was carrying it out into the hall for my evaluation.  Now, that would have been a shame after all that work.

What's Goin' On?

I figured it was time to post an update on Sweet Mary, as a few of you have recently written to me with some questions.  I've been pretty focused on my class lately and haven't been too communicative.  So, here you go.  I'll do my best to answer all of them.  If you're not interested in personal information, skip this post!  I'll have another interview and recipe up soon.

1.  It's true.  I only have 6 full weeks of classes left.  I am enrolled in an Associate of Science in Baking and Pastry Art program.  I only have one academic year of classes because I already have two degrees and I earned a ton of transfer credit.  So, this year has been filled with baking labs, baking formula technology, sanitation, and cost control management.

For those of you who are curious or thinking about some kind of wacky career change,  I have a BA in French/Secondary Education.  Yes, I used to be a teacher.  I've taught several subjects, worked with all ages, tutored adults and kids, worked in learning/day care centers, worked with emotionally disturbed/autistic kids, and was even a home school teacher for a year for a wealthy family on the island of Moorea in French Polynesia.  I would definitely say my specialty was middle school French, though.  I loved teaching those crazy kids.

In addition, I have an MA in International and Intercultural Management.  After teaching, I worked in higher education for seven years as an international program (i.e. study abroad) administrator and adviser.  My truest calling in life is definitely that of an educator/adviser.  No matter how hard I try to get away from it, I always go back to it.  The burnout is so high, though, that I find taking breaks from the grind works.  And, now, with this degree, I am thinking of all kinds of creative ways to use and share what I know and love. 

2. I'd also like to mention that I didn't jump into this program on an impulse.  For years, I was thinking of either a culinary degree or an MFA (I was big into black/white photography).  I researched programs all over the country.  I moonlighted in a bread bakery for almost 6 months on top of my job at a liberal arts college to experience the industry first hand.  I talked to some pastry chefs.  I visited bakeries to observe different models.  I read about culinary schools and the industry. 

What finally drove me to make the decision to do this was, frankly, a divorce and extreme burnout in my study abroad job.  I had been a home baker for a long time.  But, through my divorce, I couldn't afford photography anymore.  So, I baked and cooked.  A lot.  My kitchen was a haven for me and I realized how much I loved baking.  I mean really loved baking.  It just started to make sense.   One thing I couldn't stand about my job in higher education was the amount of time spent behind a desk in front of a computer.  It just never felt natural. I always missed teaching, too.  And, I couldn't teach in that environment without a PhD.  I looked into many doctoral programs thinking that was the answer, but would always end up queasy when I thought about going through with it or what the final outcome would be.   

Then, there was this one day......when my desire to go to culinary school to see where it would take me became undeniable.  I took a friend to a bakery in Washington D.C. to taste the cake and eat in the cafe next door.   I watched someone frost a cake on a turntable.  I smelled the vanilla.  I heard the mixers.  The thought of going back to work to sit behind my desk made my stomach hurt.   So, that was it.  I couldn't NOT do it, you know.  Then, things happened very very quickly.  It was unbelievable.  I narrowed my school choices down to two and scheduled visits to both.  I put my house and the market and it sold in three weeks in the dead of winter.  The closing date became my get the heck out of Baltimore date!   It was sooner than expected, but, all in all, worked out wonderfully well.   

2. I will graduate from Johnson & Wales in November 2007.  To finish my degree, I must complete a full-time internship in the industry during the fall trimester.  I am currently working on where that might be and am not ready to share details because it's just too early to. 

You know, I think I will be most proud of this degree.  I've done many cool things over the years. But, this one is closest to my heart.  It was the toughest decision of my life to sell my house, leave a strong network of friends, and leave the stability (however dysfunctional) of my job.  It's also represented a massive shift in the way I live my life.  I think I just really understand on the deepest level that things can change at any given moment.  Therefore, you need to get out there and LIVE your life the way you want to.  Experience all the things you want to.  No matter what anyone else says.  I think life really sucks when you don't.  It's like that for me, of course.  I always ask myself this:  if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, would I be cool with it?  I would be.  Honest.  There's always more on my list, but there's a ton crossed off, too. 

3. One of the hard parts about this year is money, of course.  School is expensive.  The cost of living is expensive.  Health insurance is expensive.  I have definitely made sacrifices to follow this dream.  That is just part of the deal.  To get myself through school this year, I've held various temporary administrative positions.  I also have some loans and scholarships.  I am, however, currently unemployed.  My last job ran out of work and, of course, a temp is expendable.   It's been too difficult with my workload to find another job that would fit my crazy school schedule.  I actually am in class from Monday to Thursday from roughly 6am to about 1pm, some Fridays, and then on Saturdays.  I will say that it's been really nice to have extra time during the week to study, do homework, and work on projects.  I tend to sleep better, too.  Although it will be sad when classes end, I hope to be temping again as soon as possible.  I miss those paychecks, I do.   

Oh...and I'm staying in Providence this summer because I just really like it here and am truly enjoying the people I've met along my way.

4. I took a little break from baking after my party two weeks ago.  That's right.   I threw a party.  What better way to celebrate my year anniversary in Providence than to gather up a bunch of fun people and eat/drink?  I should be making a lemon meringue pie this weekend, though.  So, look for that recipe.

If there's anything you want to see up (i.e. recipes, discussions, recommendations, etc.) on Sweet Mary, just let me know and I'll do what I can.   

Dipping

OK .  Here are a few of my (better) chocolates.  These are called raspberry dips (i.e. chocolate raspberry ganache filling coated in dark chocolate).  I was happy with my progress, although they still have some consistency issues!  Let's hope I make it through my mid-term practical this week....lord knows I deserve an "A" for effort. In the meantime, we're already moving on.  We learned how to do chocolates in molds and we're creating designs for chocolate boxes. 

Later this week, I'll post my first interview and hope to also plug a local bakery/business.  Right on.

Chocolate Class

Here I am again.  Well into my latest class, Chocolate and Sugar Artistry & Showpieces.  When I start a new lab class I typically feel out of sorts for a few days and nostalgic for the previous class.  This rapid transitioning still kind of makes my head spin.  So, yes, I am pining away a bit for Hot & Cold Plated Desserts, but there is no turning back.  I'm surrounded by chocolate.

I have to admit I am having a bit of a motivation problem this week.  Maybe it's just the time change and the fact that we're required to go in at 6am.   And, class doesn't really let out until about 1:00.  So, my body is just adjusting to the extended hours.  Or, perhaps, it's that I love to learn, bake, and practice; however, I have grown a bit weary of the busy work and lecturing/preaching that goes along with being in an undergraduate environment.  It can be a bit frustrating to be an older student amongst freshmen and sophomores.  I know how to study for and take a quiz.  I have a good work ethic.  I know how to clean.  Anyway, I just have to take a deep breath and know I'm in the home stretch with only 10 weeks of classes left.   

So, last night I dreamed about dipping pralines (i.e. the chocolates pictured below).  Maybe it was because my first foray into dipping didn't go all that well yesterday.  I think the chef was getting tired of having to come to my side to demonstrate and (literally) hold my hand.  I really needed and appreciated his help, though.   

Mind you, all the tempering is going well.  We've been using the table method of tempering (pictured below) which is when you heat the chocolate up to a certain temperature, pour 2/3 out on a marble paper and start spreading it around/scraping it up till just the right moment when it approaches a certain thickness, then add it back to the third you left in the bowl to bring it back up to another temperature.  Why all this fuss?  Well, in order for the chocolate to set properly, look glossy, have a good shelf life, and be the right texture, it is absolutely necessary. I won't bore you with all the scientific details, but, you get the picture. Even when things don't go according to the master tempering plan, there are numerous things you can do to adjust the chocolate to obtain tempering.  So, it's a process.  The more things that go wrong when you start, the more experience you gain in tweaking things, using your eyes to understand texture and setting, and the more you improve.

But, dipping.  Man.  It's one of those things that look so easy but, for some of us, is a bit of a struggle.  So, that's where I am.  Dipping my little heart out.  Trying to quell the frustration I am feeling.  And, praying that tomorrow my pralines come out better.  The chef keeps telling me how heavy they look and that I am not shaking enough chocolate off.  Meanwhile, my pralines keep flying off the fork in the bowl of chocolate.  And, in my head, I am screaming, give me some pie dough, let me make some pastry cream.  My hands get that.  You know, there's only so many crappy looking chocolates you can eat without the chef noticing!  I'm kidding, of course.   But, I did feel like hiding them today. My chocolates were chunky. 

Below, you'll see some mocha, peanut butter, and apricot squares.  None of these are mine!   I made sure to snap some photos of the way things are supposed to look.   I'm going to go in tomorrow and give it my all.  No matter how they turn out, I will sure as hell know I tried. 

   

Done

Another week has come and gone.  Now that I am looking back on it, I am not sure how I made it through this one, as I hurt my back on Monday.  This made going through the two day practical really challenging because I was in pain and simply exhausted.  No need to go into details.  I just put my best game face on and finished the class as strong as I could given the circumstances.  And, I am really grateful to my chef and classmates who helped me out with lifting and cleaning. 

So, here's the last few photos from class.  I had so much fun during the past two weeks with all the desserts we were doing.  It was challenging, rewarding, fast-paced, creative, etc.  The first one is a Mignardise (plate of small confections/cookies) with biscotti, brownies, and cookies.  The second is a pear poached in red wine with blood orange sauce, blackberry sauce, cardamom ice cream and almond lace cookies.  The third is a modern take on an ice cream sandwich with brownies, cardamom ice cream, chocolate sauce, plum sauce, and violet colored sugar spikes.  I'd love to make improvements on this one....make it a triple decker, use a more delicate cookie of a darker color, use a smaller circle so I could pipe more henna designs on the plate.  And, it's too bad you can't see the beautiful violet color of the sauce that matches the spikes in that crappy lighting.  And, yum, that cardamom ice cream was delicious.  All in all, I am really happy with everything I learned in this class.  It was fantastic.  Now, it's on to Chocolate and Sugar Showpiece class and into my last three months of class after a week off.  How nice.

Wintery Week

Bitter cold.  Sleet.  Freezing rain.  Having to get up even earlier just to defrost the car.  Or, in my case, boil water to pour over the door just so you can get it open.  Mind you, I have to do this a tad before 6 am.  To top it off, everyone is sick.  All around me.  At school.   At work.  Sneezes.  Coughs.  Snot.  All I felt like doing this week was making soup, drinking tea, and crawling under blankets. 

One more week, I keep telling myself.  By Thursday, Trimester # 2 will be done.  And, as I feel the congestion increasing, I keep telling myself that if I can just ward this cold off till after my two day practical in Hot and Cold Plated Desserts on Tuesday and Wednesday, I'm home free.

Class has been fun, though.  We got to the point where we design our own plates every day.  You can experiment with flavors as much or as little as you want.  I found myself making compotes and sauces off the top of my head, sharing ideas with students, and dreaming up my plates for my practical exam.  I think I will miss this class, honestly.  It makes me feel like a real chef because there is so much variety, creativity, and experimentation.  And, with Chocolate class coming up next, well, I am a little scared of the mess I see myself making on a daily basis.  I should have to wear a big plastic bag or something because I, somehow, get covered in chocolate every time I work with it.

Anyway, here are some of my creations for the week.  Some worked well.  Some needed some improvements. The first is a Grapefruit Orange No Bake Cheese Cake with Citrus Mirror Glaze, fruit, and Chocolate Sauce.  And, the second is a Chocolate Tasting Plate that is a bit too overloaded.  It has a chocolate brownie with whipped cream, chocolate creme brulee, chocolate sorbet and blackberry/raspberry compote cooked in pomegranate sauce drizzled with chocolate sauce    The third one is an Apple Strudel with Cherry Vanilla Ice Cream and Cherry Apricot Compote flavored with Orange Liqueur (and a chocolate cinnamon cigarette).  The next is  Mango Ice Cream in a chocolate cup with passion fruit and cherry sauce.  I was pretty skimpy with the ice cream, which was funny.  I think I did that because I don't like to eat a lot of dessert.  So, we were calling it the Skinny Girl's Dessert.

 

Lovely

It is 6:43 pm after a busy busy busy week during which I did all kinds of crazy things.  Like forget my pastry kit at school.  Then, the very next day, I forgot my notebook which I needed so I could study for my mid-term.  So, I had to skip lunch and drive back to get it before work.  These are the things that happen when you're tired.  You forget things.  You get loopy. 

Despite my rampant loopiness, I managed to create a cool plate design for the poached fruit we did this week.  We all either roasted or poached fruit.  Then, we designed our own plates and got to test them out for service to the dining room.  I really love thinking up plates and arrangements, even when I'm tired. 

You know, when I took all those photography courses when I was in Baltimore, I was always so amazed at how differently I would look at and observe things.  All types of things.  Shapes.  Colors. Shadows.  Shades.  Inside. Outside.  Just looking became interesting.  And, I wanted my camera on me at all times.  To frame.  To look through the lens.  To shoot what I noticed. 

I feel the same way right now.  Getting deeper into the sights, shapes, smells, tastes around me.  Finding inspiration in my daily observations.  I started carrying a little notebook again so I could jot things down.  Flavor combinations.  Stuff to make.  Swishes.  Patterns.  Textures.  And, in class, I do have my camera.  I had a moment this week when the pears came out of the red wine sauce and they were all lined up on a tray, steaming rolling off of them, swirling into the air.  The smell of the wine and spices was divine.  The sultry steam drew me right over to the tray to observe and then, grab my trusty digital camera to snap a photo, which I have (even though I forgot to shut my flash off).   How I'd love to photograph so much of what we do or make.  But, without that damn fluorescent lighting bouncing off the steel surfaces.  My photos here never look like what I really see.

Anyway, here is my lovely dessert.  A pear poached in red wine/spices with vanilla almond ice cream, red wine reduction sauce drizzled over top, and a tulip paste cookie for a crunch on top.  The one suggestion my chef had for this was to use an almond lace cookie on top instead.  That way, there would be a stronger connection to the slivered almonds in the ice cream (which you can't even see).

Mid-term Madness

Another week just flew by.  Another mid-term practical just came and went.  Sometimes I feel like I am training for a sport.  These days are all about speed, stamina, and accuracy.

Yeah, my current chef reminds me of an athletic coach.  A good athletic coach.  She's here, there, everywhere in the kitchen.  Her voice can be heard from the walk-in, the store room, the hallway, or over by the ovens.  She pushes you.  Times you.  Tells you to move faster.  Quizzes you on important methods or facts while you're already juggling five things.  She gives great demonstrations.  She'll nag you if you forgot to clean something or if you didn't squeegee the floors enough because she wants her kitchen to sparkle and meet sanitation standards. She yells at you if you do something stupid.  And, I don't mean in a nasty way.  She just doesn't miss a trick.  Even with 17 of us whizzing around her.  And, well, I know all about this because sometimes I screw up or try to take shortcuts.  Like, this week, when I used the wrong bowl on the mixing machine and caused the loudest ugliest noise to resonate in the room.  Or, when I used my paring knife to peel apples during the mid-term because it was faster than the peeler from our kits (which I hate).  Or, when I forgot to label my apple filling in the middle of the mid-term on the cooling racks. 

But, you know, I don't mind her getting after me.  Nope.  Not at all. She wants me to be the best.  She wants me to do it right.  She wants me to succeed out in the field.  She's also there when you need her.  She'll come right over to the bench anytime you need help or support.  Her expectations are high, but they are clear and there is ample opportunity to strut your stuff and show her your knowledge, skills, and effort.  And, she always tells us when we've done a great job.  She also feeds all the kids (some of whom are perpetually hung over and hungry in the mornings) snacks when they need it (eggs, apple crisp and ice cream, custard, etc.).   She's a damn good chef.  She's a damn good instructor.  Despite how tired this class makes me, I love every second of it and feel in my aching bones that this is why I chose to go to culinary school.

On that note, I'm going to go drink some tea and relax.  Here's my mid-term Dark Chocolate Raspberry Cream Pie with Chocolate and Raspberry Sauce.  I was pressed for time at the end and would have liked to thin out the chocolate squiggles and also thicken up my raspberry sauce.  It started spreading after a certain amount of time while I was waiting to get graded.  It would have looked a little classier and less cartoony.  I've also included some of the cool plate designs created by my classmates (Paul, Anthony, Jess, and Andrew) with their permission, of course.

 

 

 

My, My

My, my....here's a little apple pie.  Cake class is history.  My classmates and I are practically skipping around the kitchen.  Should I tell you again how much I love to make (and eat) pie?  Because I really, really do.  I was going to give you all an update about how hectic life is right now, but instead, just know I LOVE Hot and Cold Plated Dessert Class.  If my contact or posting is sporadic it is because my days are damn long  and my weekends are full.  That's just the way it has to be right now.  But, class is great.  There is a ton of work to do and the pace is fast.  And, the chef has high expectations and works us hard, yet is totally supportive and helpful.  That's the way I like it. 

On that note, we've been making pies, pies, and more pies.  Fruit pies.  Mini-pies.  Double crust pies.  Cream pies. Custard pies.  Oh, and let me give a little shout out to my chiropractor.  Yes, that's right.  My chiropractor.  She left me a message on Tuesday just to tell me that it was National Pie Day.  You gotta love a doctor who will leave you a message just to tell you that. 

So, here are some more pies!  In order (top, L to R):  blueberry mini-pie with ginger ice cream and mint simple syrup (this was the chef's example), apple-pear pie with lattice top, chantilly, caramel sauce, and a pear chip, the whole lattice top apple-pear pie, and a yummy delicious dark chocolate cream pie with chantilly.  And, damn, did my class make some good cream pies today?  Lemon blueberry cream.   Mango raspberry.  Chocolate banana.  Strawberry banana.  Chocolate coffee.  Chocolate peanut butter.  Heavenly, really.

Wedding Cake Mania

I am proud of Group 1 (from left to right:  Me, Laura, Andrew, Lindsay, Kristen) .  We did well. Today was our day to do group wedding cakes.  I was dreading it, really.  But, it was fun.  You take everyone's unique talents (cutting, leveling, icing, stacking, piping, arranging, etc.).  Then, you roll them together.  And, sometimes, the result can be quite striking.  Seriously, it makes me want to try it again.  And, again.  Till the cake starts looking better and better.  Then, perfect.  That's what I'm talking about.

Here's a bit of the cake building process, the final outcome, and, well, the demolition!  How fun was that to stick your hands in the cake and squish'em all around.  Wrecking cakes is not normally part of the deal as our products go to the dining halls. Today, we were allowed to because there was no place for our cakes to go.  We used real flowers, too, and were unable to obtain organic.  Therefore, our cake was inedible.  Unless you like a little pesticide on your slice of cake.

 

Cruddy

It's not that I've lost interest in my cake class.  Really.  It's just that, well, I kind of suck at icing cakes and making butter cream roses.  Yes.  I will admit to having had potentially delusional fantasies of becoming some kind of super cake woman.  This class may have crushed those.  But, you know.  It's hard.  Damn hard.

Now, I'd give anything to go back to the simple layers we were doing.  Yes, take me back to the Ring Method so I can make the sides of my cake look like glass.  I swear I could get my spatula out and work for 10 hours and my cake would still look crooked and dinged up.

I'm half joking.  Half serious.  It's been both hilarious and frustrating, but isn't that always the way.  It's good, though.  That's what I keep telling myself even though frosting cakes is just not good for my self esteem.  Yes, it's good.  Takes me out of my baking comfort zone.  Makes me use my hands in a way I never have.

Then, of course, there's Andrew.  I should have included a montage of his perfect cakes which he whips up faster than any of us and 99.9% of them look so damn pretty.  And, level.  And, smooth.  Both he and another person at my table, Lindsay, rock.  Yes, they do.  Thank god they're in my group because tomorrow we're doing a group four tier wedding cake. Yeah, I know.  Maybe I should just watch.  Makes me shudder to think of my Advanced Cake class in the spring.  Oh Lord.

Well, in an attempt to get over my perfectionist tendencies, here's my very first wedding cake.  As you can see, the sides are kind of cruddy, the border is too swishy, my swags are draggy, etc.  But, I did get better on the roses (at least on top of the cake).  I think they finally stopped looking just like carnations and now are at least a cross between a carnation and a rose.  My progress is slow, but , hey, I am moving forward.  Then, we broke it open because I had some serious trouble slicing the cake layers due to a very dry crumbly pound cake.  It was ugly.  Really.  A bride's nightmare.

I have the utmost respect for talented cake people.  I do.  But, damn, I can't wait till my new class starts next week so I can roll some freaking pie dough and plate up some swanky desserts!